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H E A D W A Y  G A U T E N G

Dedicated to assisting people with brain injuries and their families

December 2007/ January 2008
Dear Members

Headway wishes all its members a very enjoyable festive season and a happy, healthy and prosperous new year.  To those lucky people who will be travelling to holiday destinations, please drive carefully.

Our Activity Day programme will close on Friday 14th December and re-open on Monday 14th January.  However, although there will be no-one in the office, Eric will be on call to deal with any emergencies and his home number will be on our answering machine.  Even though this is the time for everyone to be ‘jolly’, families with brain injured members often battle when these family holidays come around.  If you are feeling down don’t hesitate to give Eric a call, he is such an empathetic person and will be willing to listen to any problems.

FEEDBACK FROM MEETING ON 20TH SEPTEMBER:
Sylvia Birkhead, a well known Occupational Therapist was the guest speaker at this meeting.  Her subject was ‘Health and Wellness’.

Sylvia looked at different areas of our life, beginning with physical wellness.   She said that a healthy body leads to a healthy mind.  In order to have a healthy mind we need to think positively, be flexible not rigid in our thoughts and be articulate, communicating well.  We need to have good concentration.  Next Sylvia looked at our emotional health.  For this we need to be level headed, we need balance and anger management.   Then we have communication health.  Getting along with other people, keeping eye contact, and being a good listener all help with how we communicate.  Our spiritual health is having good life values, morals and principals.  Social wellness is how we respond to other people, our friendships and relationships.

Sylvia asked if these had been affected by TBI.  Do friends draw back because they don’t know how to handle the personality changes?  People with TBI don’t understand others reaction to them, so this also affects relationships.  They sometimes act differently with family, because they know they won’t be ‘dumped’ by them, so they are less inhibited and display anger and frustration more readily.  Families know what ‘triggers’ their TBI family member and to avoid confrontation they tend to think about every word they say to avoid confrontation which other people tend not to do.   When conflict occurs, Sylvia advises that we should try to resolve it by being open, asking questions such as, “Have I said something incorrectly?” or “Am I being understood?”  People are uncomfortable with openness, they are scared as they don’t want to upset the other person.

Sylvia set up an exercise to help us to assess our own lives.  We drew a circle, and divided this into 6 ‘slices’. Each slice represents one of the wellness areas, Communication, Intellectual, Emotional, Social, Spiritual and Physical.  

Then we draw 10 lines in each slice. We then plotted a graph according to how healthy we felt we were in each of the wellness areas. The outside line is the best/or stronger, working in to our weaker area at the centre of the circle.  We marked where we think we are with a dot, and then joined up the dots to find out where we are now. (See diagram below.)

In the intellectual slice we would assess things like knowledge, memory, creativity, ongoing learning, new ideas, alertness and curiosity.  The physical slice would assess exercise, memory, creativity, ongoing learning, new ideas, alertness and curiosity.   The spiritual slice assesses meaning of life, peace, religious affiliation, and our life values, morals and principals.  The communication slice assesses our ability to listen, how we express ourselves, how much we hide our feelings, our writing communication, and our openness.  The emotional slice assesses how we express our feelings, if we act appropriately and our emotional balance/stability.

(Please note there are only seven lines in this example, and the dots would be placed more centrally in the circle.)

Our ‘homework’ was to look at areas where we would like to improve or change and to think each day how to make things different.  Our circles /wheels will change as our health and wellness improves.

Sylvia always holds extremely interesting and challenging meetings and we thank her most sincerely for taking the time to speak to our group.

A big thank you, as always, to Kath and Charles McRobert for taking the notes.

FEEDBACK FROM END OF YEAR FUNCTION:
Our end of year function was a huge success in spite of the weather.  (A downpour of note just before the party delayed some people.  In fact Charles McRobert took 3 hours to get from Johannesburg City to Hyde Park!)  Thank you to Eric who once again organized everything and to all his helpers who put out decorations which were donated by Alison Gitelson.  Thank you Alison, they make Headway look really festive.  Quentin Stock and his assistant Debbie from Creative Cocktails provided the delicious food at a very reasonable cost, and we were entertained by our choir from Khomelela (our outreach programme in Alexandra) which was conducted by our music therapist Marisa Bladergroen.  Everyone was singing along and tapping their feet.  This was enjoyed so much that several encores were requested.  Gareth Cliff (of Radio 5 fame) also attended the party.  He says we are his ‘favourite charity’ and spoke about Headway on his programme on Radio 5 the next day.  We thank him for giving us this wonderful exposure.  Most of all, a big thank you to all of you who attended, and helped to make the evening a success.  The raffle of a weekend away at a Southern Sun Hotel which Hester Forte had got donated was drawn on the night and was won by our volunteer Di Pearce.  Congratulations Di and thank you to Hester.  The raffle raised approximately R6000!

Whenever I attend these HFC functions I meet up with people I haven’t seen for a while, and am once again impressed by their ongoing courage and perseverance.  I see families reaching out to each other in love and compassion, and I know that Headway holds a special place in our members’ hearts.  We thank Eric Delmont who goes the extra mile in order to ensure that the Headway ‘family’ continues to flourish.

ANNIVERSARIES OF ACCIDENT/ILLNESS:
Stop waiting for someone to give you your life.  You’ll be waiting a long time.  You may have many choices in life.  Always choose the path that contributes to your growth and that makes you feel at peace with yourself and others.  Susan Jefferson.

December Anniversaries:
Barrie Cole                                             2001                 Charl Jordaan                                         1994
Janky Diale                                            1998                 Deon Lombard                                       1989
Maurice Goodman                                  2001                 Michael Maré                                         1993
Gina Greenhalgh                         1998                 Gina Nell-Denton                                    2004
Warren Hayne                                        1995                 Tet Singh                                              2000
John Holm                                             1997                 Willem Visser                                         1996

January Anniversaries:
Marc Boxall                                           1980                 Blane Leonard                                        2006
Jean Buchel                                           2004                 Michael Morcom                                    2004
Antonio Camoesas                                  2007                 Chad Pieterse                                         2002
Daniela Cassuto                                      2006                 Keith Pogorelsky                                    2003
Carl Chiaberta                                        1998                 Filipe Pombo                                          2005
Melissa Gevers                                       2005                 Marlyn Prettejohn                                   2004
Marinda Kuyvenhoven                            2001

NEW MEMBERS:
We welcome Nicki and Michelle Morrison and Gerda van Rensburg and her brother Johan to Headway.  We hope that their time with us will be a fruitful and happy one.

GET WELL SOON:
A special get well message to attendee David Coulter who broke his femur.  This had to be pinned and he is now recovering at home.  We look forward to seeing him back at Headway soon.

Best wishes also to Mike Morcom who has undergone a major operation just recently.  Our thoughts and prayers are with him and his wife Sharon and we hope he will soon be on the mend.

We send love and special wishes to Janet Graham (volunteer) who is recovering after an operation.

Sheila Meyerowitz (our volunteer co-ordinator) will be going ‘under the knife’ shortly.  She has been having major problems with her back and has decided to have an operation to fix it.  We send best wishes and look forward to seeing her hale and healthy in the New Year.

CONDOLENCES:
Our love and sympathies go to Linda Blackburn (a volunteer) whose mom passed away recently.

Our thoughts and prayers are with Nicolette Engels (our bookkeeper) whose elderly father was brutally murdered in November.

Ryan Douglas Poole: 26th February 1979 – 25th November 2007
We were deeply saddened to hear of the tragic passing of Ryan Poole.  Ryan, together with Adam Thal, created Star Productions, the fantastic company that filmed and produced the Headway DVD.  Ryan was truly larger than life both literally (at 6 foot 7!) and figuratively.  He was dynamic, warm and passionate about life and people and had a wonderfully contagious sense of humour.  Ryan lived life the way we all wish we had the guts to live!  As his siblings and friends said – he lived like a rock star!  His memorial service was a tribute to the unique and special person he was.  Our sincerest condolences go to his family, friends and to Adam during this very difficult time.  It was our privilege to have worked with Ryan this year and we have no doubt that Star Productions will grow from strength to strength in his memory.

CONGRATULATIONS:
Congratulations to our member Dylan Prinsloo who has now received his card to be a pool referee and has already refereed 3 games.

TRIBUTE TO HEADWAY:
Ishmael Nkome is a young man who was injured in a car accident in 2004 and is one of our attendees.  A few weeks ago he came into my office, sat us all down and proceeded to extol the virtues of our organisation.  We were really touched by this and I asked him to please write me a piece to put in the newsletter.  This is as follows –

“Giving up is not an option and it will never be.  My first perceptions when arriving at Headway was that this would just be a waste of time, and that there was no way that this place would help me.  DAMN I WAS SO WRONG!!   And I am so glad that I was wrong.  I am a totally different person from the one I was when I first came to Headway.  Wow do I feel great!!!  I have only been at Headway for a period of a year and a few months minus the days, weeks and months when I had to go into hospital for various operations.  I thank the staff at Headway, the attendees, and also June, Margie and Ann who are the founders of Headway as well as Eric, Tamsyn, Michele, Sheila and all the other therapists and volunteers who are involved in helping the brain injured.  This also includes the staff and attendees at HOPA in Alex.  Headway is giving me and the other attendees hope for the future by putting our lives back on track. 

When I had my first interview with Tamsyn I told her about perseverance and my belief in God and that I believed that I will be back on my feet again.  I guess this explains my day to day resilience.  Michele put my mind at ease when I first came to Headway because she told me not to worry about not remembering what happened when I had my accident, because the brain works in a way which saves you from having to relive something so traumatic.

I pray to God to keep Headway running so that many of us continue to get the help that we want and deserve.  I would like to thank all the companies and organisations that give Headway money to keep it in operation.

I thank Sue-Ann Hardie, her husband Tony and their children for allowing me to come and stay in their home, and I am grateful to Sue because she is the one who found Headway for me.

Last but not least I would like to thank my parents:  I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!”

Thank you Ishamel for this moving tribute.  We would like to commend you for your courage and determination.  You have been through a lot and yet you have always remained positive – you are an example to us all.

A NEW YORK EXPERIENCE:
My NYC Marathon by Next
Next is an attendee at HOPA (or Khomelela as it is now known) and he was lucky enough to be sponsored by the Achilles Club to run the New York Marathon.  This is his account of the experience -

“I went to OR Tambo Airport with Dennis.  He’s the leader for Achilles South Africa.  It was the first time I had ever been to an airport or flown in a plane, and I was very excited.  At the airport I met up with the two other people, Braam and Nombuso, from KZN, who were also going to run the marathon.  Actually Nombuso was the lady who was in charge of us, and was there to show us the way, and to look out for us because we are disabled (I hate to use that term) but she was there to help us.  There were also two cameramen who filmed everything from the airport through to New York and the marathon itself.

Dennis had organized the tickets and everything for me.  Because it was my first time travelling I had no idea what to do, and he took care of me.  I appreciated his help because if I was alone there would be no way I could have organised my trip.

We left South Africa at about 7pm and landed in New York City at about 6:30 in the morning the next day.  I couldn’t believe what a long flight it was especially when we stopped in Senegal and I learned that we still had another 8 hours to go!  When we got to New York we were met by the South African consulate who took us to our Hotel, Club Quarters, in mid town New York.

The marathon was on Sunday early in the morning.  I felt prepared, and didn’t have doubt in myself, even though it was a long distance of 42 km.  I was going to finish no matter what.

When I started the race I enjoyed everything.  I met people on the street.  They called my name.  They told me to not give up.  And I was encouraged by all these supporters.  When I reached the 30km mark my left leg which is the one that is affected by my injury was really sore.  I told my guide that my leg was sore but he said “Next, you have to finish, you have less than 15 km to go.  Keep going!”  I looked in my heart and realized that I did want to finish.  I didn’t leave South Africa to not finish the New York Marathon.  The people kept cheering me on, and I started to realize how many fans I had in the US.  This helped me to keep going.

At this stage I was walking, and I noticed so many people in wheelchairs and on crutches all battling to get to the finish line.  It was a huge mix of many people.  I was determined to finish the marathon. I had left my country with a purpose.  I wanted to bring something back to HOPA to show everyone that if you tell yourself you want to do something, you should do it with all your heart.  I did, and I continue to do so.

With only 400m to go, I saw myself on the screen and knew that I was going to finish.  With 200m left, I knew it was easy.  A child was encouraging me to go on, saying “you got it brother!”  My guides helped me too.  They asked how I was doing and asked if I wanted to stop.  I told them that I wanted to keep going.  And that’s that!  I did the marathon!  It took me 7h45 minutes.  I started at 8 and ended at 3:45.  I have the medal!  I feel that I have done something for the disabled.  I showed people what a disabled person can do.

To other disabled people my advice is not to sit at home and rot away.  Do things.  Ask people, find out things you can do, try different things and make up your mind to take up challenges.  Even if there’s a risk, give it a try, you can always ask people for help.  Just because you are in a wheelchair does not mean to say that you should consider yourself disabled.

To those with head injuries - keep fighting, keep working.  Anybody can do anything that they put their minds to!”

Well done Next for accomplishing such an amazing feat.

THANKS FOR DONATIONS:
Our activity centre in Hyde Park gets very hot in summer and we are, therefore, extremely grateful to Emile and Michele Cahi for their donation of 4 air conditioners.  This will make a huge difference, especially in the OT room.

We would like to thank Glen Davison from Booksite Afrika who donated brand new books as gifts for our attendees.  And a big thank you to Clive Harding who organised this donation.

Rozanne Gevers and her friends Annie, Christine, Penny, Max and Marianne donated R400 to Headway instead of buying Christmas gifts for each other.  We really appreciate this gesture of goodwill.

Thank you to Grant Thornton Chartered Accountants who donated R1000.

Thank you to Marcia Mouyis who donated a lovely tapestry in a beautiful frame.

WHEELCHAIR FOR SALE:
Brand new wheelchair from USA for sale.  Folds up – small and lightweight.  Please contact Mrs Kerwin 072 445-0248 for more information. 

NEXT MEETINGS:
The next HFC meetings will take place on 13th December, 2007, 10th January 2008 and 24th January 2008 at the Headway Centre, 85 1st Road Hyde Park at 6 pm.  Friends and family are welcome to attend.  A light supper will be served after the meeting.
---ooo0ooo---
Editor and compiler – Annie Coe

Thought for the Day : To be interesting we need to be interested.

I always like to watch “The Weakest Link”.  However, it is always easier when you are sitting in your armchair at home.  Here are some ‘funnies’ from various quiz shows around the world.

DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)
Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?
Contestant: I don't know, I need a clue.
Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?
Contestant: Cartons?

QUIZMANIA (ITV)
Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'.
Contestant: Doctor.
Scott: No, it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango.
Contestant: Oh, right . . . (pause) . . . Doctor.

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester.

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're . . .?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?
Contestant: France.
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris.

BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)
DJ Mark: For £10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant: Goosey?

GWR FM (Bristol)
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

RTE RADIO 2FM (IRELAND)
Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The ...?
Caller: Mohicans.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)
Phil: What's 11 squared?
Contestant: I don't know.
Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY
Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
A: Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND JUDY
Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes bread .. ..
Contestant: Er . .. .
Leslie: He makes cakes .. .
Contestant: Kipling Street?

MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)
Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?
Contestant: Erm .. .
Presenter: Well, let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964.
Contestant: 1965?

We will carry on with some more of these in the next newsletter.